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Summer Flings Make Me Feel Fine

Summer Flings Make Me Feel Fine

Life has a sense of humor; sometimes it’s funny, sometimes it’s tragic and sometimes that asshole, called life, is a bit of a pecker as she peppers your life with copious amounts of ironic sorrow.

It’s tough enough being an adult without irony, dammit! This is the first Summer I’ve truly been able to enjoy since I was sporting a freakish bright orange-red afro, with snot dripping out of my nose.

You might even say I looked a bit like Thurman Murman, from the Bad Santa (if you have the choice of seeing Bad Teacher or Bad Santa, see Bad Santa. Trust me). Though it’s been a while, I can say I truly do appreciate all that summer has to offer.

The theme for this Insomnia Club post is Summer Flings… Well, I can’t really tell you of too many eventful Summer Flings so I’ll tell you something different.

I’ll tell you about some Summer lovin’ I’m all wrapped up into right now. You see, I recently moved in with my girlfriend.

While things have been great since we settled in, there’s been some things that I’ve noticed that have been hard to digest, but, ultimately, have been very good.

Summer Fling – A sexual adventure free of hassles, commitments or drama, timed for the summer only. Something light and fun-filled with nothing to worry about at the end of the season. Usually not exclusive to one person, ends in a mutual agreement of friendship. Urban Dictionary

First off, my lady is a teacher. So she has Summers off. Secondly, I’m a no-good bastard of an asshole carnival worker who got laid off his job a few months ago for sitting on his thumbs and doing less than no work. I have Summers off, too, it would seem, as a result… Hmmm.

Having this time off with my lady has been good. It’s a lot better than I thought it would be, truth be told.

I’m pretty sure that I would be under her thumb and she’d be wearing my testicles on her keyring as she drives off to some far off place.

I’m happy to report that my nuts are still attached. It turns out we’ve actually had some good times living together.

The funny? Now we actually have to talk about our issues; you know, since I can’t say “Well fuck off, I’m going home!” After all… I am home.

Many sweaty nights have been shared, as sheets are torn off, flesh is clawed and bitten, bodies are spent and left flush and panting… Over and over again. Could it be that I’m destined to an entire Summer of sneak attacks between the sheets?